Save the Dates - May Calendar for BK WOW

April Showers bring May Flowers...

Happy May Day!
This month brings two new events for Ellen and I to sign and share our books both on May 12.

Look for Ellen at the Sue Miller Day of Caring for Breast Cancer Awareness
in Denver, CO

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Denver Marriott Tech Center

4900 S. Syracuse St., Denver, CO 80237

8:00 A.M. – 2:00 P.M.

Find Nanci at Hockessin Book Shelf
7179 Lancaster Pike
Hockessin, DE
302-235-7665
hockessinbookshelf@verizon.net

Buy a Butterfly Wish in honor or memory of someone you love...
and pay it forward

Ellen will be at the Sue Miller Day of Caring in Denver, and Nanci will be at the Hockessin Book Shelf signing books and selling Butterfly Wishes for $1.00 to benefit Christiana Care's Cancer Special Needs Fund at the Helen F. Graham Cancer Center.

Glad to Help

This colorful Thank you was recently received all the way from the Department of Child Psychiatry at the Chris Hani Baragwanath Hospital in Johannesburg, South Africa after we received the initial request below.

Thank you so so so much for all those books.  I finally collected the parcel at the end of last week.  You are absolute stars.  I’m taking the books down to the ward today.

 

Wow!

 

Megan

Your book and resources look amazing. I am a clinical psychologist working in a large government hospital in a very impoverished community in South Africa. I run groups for kiddies with cancer as well as the parents of these kiddies (from birth to 18 years). The unit currently has no \'story\' that can be used to explain cancer to the kiddies, or for us to share with the parents to help them to explain cancer to their kiddies and, in general, resources are very scant. Any donations of your products or offers of special rates on them would be much appreciated. 


Kind regards
Megan Jones
Community Service Clinical Psychology
Department of Child Psychiatry
Chris Hani Baragwanath Hospital, Johannesburg, South Africa 




We love that our book has found its way to Africa and feel blessed that we too, can be butterflies!

"My pictures always make her smile..."
Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings:
When someone you love has cancer... a hopeful, helpful book for kids
©2012McVicker&Hersh, LLC

Lessons Learned

Some conversations - or lessons learned are never easy.

"She said it's hard to explain.
I asked her to try anyway."
Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings: When someone you love has cancer... a hopeful, helpful book for kids
©2012McVicker&Hersh,LLC

My boys attended their first funeral this past weekend. We had a week or two to prepare them that their aunt was in the hospital and that there was a strong chance that she may not pull through.

The real shock was that our sister-in-law was so sick. Apparently, had been for a while. She mentioned some tests to a couple of us, but her adult sons were not aware of all this. These past three weeks, for both of them, have been a crash course in navigating the medical and legal fields, all while dealing with their own shock, sense of overwhelm, grief, and anger, at having been unaware of what was going on with their mom.

Some conversations are never easy, but we need to give our children, at any age, a place to ask questions, express fears and concerns and feel a part of our lives. While we can.

As parents, we want to "protect" our children.  The reality is that we can't. We can only show our love by empowering them with tools that foster resilience and trust. Knowing what and how much to tell our children will vary depending on age and situation, but the lesson learned this past weekend is that it is a conversation that needs to happen, before it's too late.

How much have you told your children about a challenging illness or situation in your family? 

For links to resources and support, please visit our Butterfly Kisses Book website
In addition, Supporting Kidds offers a number of programs and information for grief support for children and their families.

Putting it out There- Saline or Silicone?

We are all about supporting children and their families when someone they love has cancer.

This post, is for the moms out there facing cancer and all those decisions that keep coming at us.

You've had the mastectomy and decided to go forward with the reconstruction, survived the pain, the drains, and then the discomfort of the tissue expanders.  Now you face the decision- saline or silicone implants?

They were Starting to Sag, anyway
Encaustic, collage on wood
©2012NanciHersh

http://www.implantinfo.com/breast_implants/silicone_gel_breast_implants/introduction_saline_vs_silicone_breast_implants.aspx Google away my friends, be informed, then read on...

Following my bilateral mastectomy 8 and a half years ago I went with silicone implants. I felt comfortable with my decision,  They did look good, and they felt - well, I honestly can't remember.

Regardless, nothing held me back- I swam, surfed, practiced yoga and lived my beautiful life.

Last year when I learned that I had a second cancer in residual breast tissue again on the right side, I went for a PET Scan. That showed unsual findings on the "other" side/breast- a large "hot spot." They were ready to biopsy that side as well.  Thankfully, a friend and doctor showed my disk and reports to a fellow radiologist who specializes in reading scans.  He felt confident that it was a ruptured implant and that an inasive biopsy on that side was not necessary. He was indeed correct, my silicone implant had ruptured and my chest wall was inflamed- "angry and red" is how my plastic surgeon described it.

Long story short... following the surgery last April to removed the cancerous tissue and node I went with Saline implants.  Honestly, they too, look good, they feel fine and more importantly, I believe that they pose less of a risk for a breast cancer patient.  One less thing to think about.

There you go...  what is your experience or choice- saline or silicone?

PS... I just realized that my surgery was a year ago- tomorrow !!!!... feeling blessed for another year and feeling good.

Books on WINGS

Some crazy weather here on the east coast. Snow back in October and temperatures reaching 80 mid March. Go figure. One thing that Ellen and I do notice however, regardless of Mother Nature and unseasonal weather fluctuation, is that Butterflies are everywhere!

Snow White Buds Blooming

Margaret Zuccotti is one such beautiful soul who has given our book WINGS. Diagnosed with Stage 4 inflammatory breast cancer in 2006, she discovered a lump while nursing her infant son.  Thus began the path of surgery, treatment and advocacy for this wife, mother of 3, daughter, sister, friend, athlete (she was the first survivor to cross the finish line at the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in Philadelphia,  and now, butterfly.

Margaret and her kids

An educator by profession, Margaret created the Louise S. Mauran Book Fund in honor of her mother to support families in the Fox Chase Cancer Center community where she receives treatment.  Margaret contacted us after she found our book online and shared Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings with other families facing cancer. We are honored to be a part of her fund and at the top of her list!

In addition, Margaret brought copies of our books, including our new Spanish edition to the recent C4YW conference in New Orleans last month as part of her brand new Reading for Reassurance initiative.  Hope you'll visit her Facebook page and click LIKE to keep on top of where she is taking this.

Thank you Margaret!

I feel that 'BK WOW' is a wonderful story because it touches on many of the challenges faced by families dealing with cancer. Why do you have cancer? Can I catch your cancer? Will you be ok? Is it alright that I am scared? These questions are asked by children of all ages and the book addresses them beautifully. It is great to find a resource that comforts the reader and the listener all at the same time. 

Margaret Zuccotti

Who is a butterfly in your life?  Who has helped you help others?

Just Like Me

This is from a card that was forwarded to us by someone who had gifted our book to a friend and her children following her cancer diagnosis.

Snuggle Me
Archival digital print
20" x 16"
from the book
Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings

Thank you so much for the beautiful book. 


I had read a couple of books to the boys but the one you gave us was by far the most beautifully written and most appropriate in every way for Jack to identify with.  As I read it to him on every other page he would say "that's just like me, Mommy!"


                                                                                                                             Sally 

Sally went on to say " We are certainly in for the battle of our lives, but we are feeling blessed..."


Thank you for sharing our book.  Ellen and I also feel blessed to bring some comfort to others, as so many have done for me, and for us.
                                                         Nanci

Finding Balance

Nanci's cairn

Just a year ago I posted a Thank You Note to the Big C on my Art & Inspiration Blog.
It was also a kind of good riddance closure kind of thing. Not happening. Many of you know that two months later I learned that I had breast cancer again. Apparently many of my life lessons needed to be revisted.

Earlier this month the Helen F. Graham Cancer Center hosted their First Day of Hope. They offered a day of nteresting speakers, info and workshops. One workshop in particular resonated with me. It was cairn building using small river stones. The intention was to help us identify the various roles we take on in our lives and finding the right balance for optimum health.

Here was the process:
1. Choose any 5 stones from a large selection on the table in front of you. (this was done before knowing step #2.
2. Assign a role to each of the stones that you have chosen.  If you have more than 5 pick your top 5. Already that was a good way to limit how much we each take on!
3. Now try to balance them on top of each other.
4. If one of them just doesn't work- take it away. (stone for "community work" didn't fit)
5. If any of the stones needs to be switched out, trade it for another.
(VERY interesting- the stone I chose for artist was too big and had to be switched)

This photo was not the arrangement I came home with.  I had put the biggest stone on the bottom which was my "mother" stone.  I shared this story with a healer I am working with and she said "You have to feed the mother (a.k.a. self) first" which interestingly enough was the way my boys stacked them when they gave it a try. They intuitively knew that!

And now my stack is balanced with putting self/healing first. As we change and our lives change so will our stones. But for now this is the way it is and I am ok with that.

Hope you find balance in your life this holiday season!